Updated: Jul 6, 2019
No, I am not reminiscing about an old Fun Boy Three track (for those that are old enough to remember!)...or looking at a homage to dear old Frank.
I've been thinking about the many conversations with people about 'checking boxes' to indicate that 'Yes!! I've achieved my goal' or 'Finally, I can go for that job I was looking for'
These boxes are often 'things' - an experience, a new skill set, x number of people managed, n years of experience, $$ sold etc etc.
However, I must confess if I am asking someone about what they need in order to achieve their goals, or when I am speaking with candidates in interviews, I am as, or maybe more, interested in 'how' you have approached ticking these boxes rather than how many you have under your belt.
So, why is the how so important?
Well in a nutshell, its what tells me something about you - how you approach things, your values. It tells me how you consider the experience, for yourself and others, as well as the outcome. I believe that creating a connection with other individuals and organisations is based very much on the rapport built based on 'how', and is the basis of a lasting relationship that can mutually realise potential; in my view the 'things' often just get you in the door.
So, what do these 'hows' look like?
Simply, they are what guides how you approach doing all those 'things' - the behaviours, how you feel and the legacy or memory you want to leave along the way.
So let me share a story about how I found my 'hows'...many years ago I went to my dear (sadly late) aunt's home in Barbados and she had a framed piece on the wall - I was transfixed! It was called the 'Supreme Prayer of my Heart' by Elbert Hubbard. It resonated massively with me and now I have a dog-eared copy on my fridge which grounds, and inspires me, every time I read it.
In a nutshell....
The supreme prayer of my heart is not to be learned, rich, famous, powerful, or ‘good,' but simply to be radiant. I desire to radiate health, cheerfulness, calm courage, and good will. I wish to live without hate, whim, jealousy, envy, fear.
I want to be happy.
I wish others to live their lives, too – up to their highest, fullest and best.
I want you to be happy
I pray that I may never meddle, interfere, dictate, give advice that is not wanted, or assist when my services are not needed.
I will do all I can to help - but only if you want to be helped
If I can help people, I'll do it by giving them a chance to help themselves; and if I can uplift or inspire, let it be by example, inference and suggestion, rather than by injunction and dictation.
I want to help you to help yourself
Seems simplistic, but I think the best principles are - and it works for me :)
When you are creating the list of what you need to do to reach the heights of your potential, remember to also place importance on how you want to do it. There are many paths you can take to reach what you aspire to. There's no right or wrong way - just your way.
Being true to your core principles, not only for how you work, but how you live your life in general, in my opinion, makes reaching your dream all the more sweet!